Seattle Observer

Here’s a statement: New York and Miami aside … the US doesn’t have much when it comes to fashion. Maybe it’s just the Northwest, where dressing up is wearing your best fleece and closed toe shoes (I’ve seen hordes in jeans and Birkinstocks at the symphony!). I see more fashion driving past two blocks in downtown Vancouver than I see in all of downtown Seattle. Not that I’m such a fashion victim, but I like good quality clothes. Simple design, great fabrics and timeless (partly because I seem to wear the same clothes for decades). I don’t like shopping, and in Holland there were 3 stores where I would shop, and if they didn’t have what I needed, I would do without. Same with shoes. Basically I need one or two new pieces each season, and even less shoes.

When we moved here I enjoyed going to the Banana Republic, and as soon as I had some credit history, I got talked into a Banana Republic card. I refrained from getting a J.Crew card, because I am weary of the American credit card model, even though these are just store cards.
Now, almost 3 years later, I need to be saved from Banana, Gap and -because it’s the same company- Old Navy. The three stores are conveniently close to each other in the downtown shopping area, without me having to suffer through a department store or mall. Although I end up not spending much, which is good for my personal economics, but bad for my wardrobe.

So, you may think I’m just cheap, and don’t want to take my wallet “up one level” where I would find the type of fashion I claim to miss here.Well, I look at it differently. In Europe there are (or were) more mid-price stores with great stuff: Laundry Industry, A Guy Named Sue, Sissy Boy … to name a few. Plus, if I have the choice between a $200 pair of pants that are only “so so” and a night at a nice bed and breakfast during our next long weekend, I’ll spend my money on travel.

I have adapted to some things that I thought I never would; walking around in sweats all weekend (you’ve gotto love the informalness of it all in Seattle), flip flops to work (especially when I was pregnant), American bras (pre-shaped and padded – comes in handy after you’ve been nursing for 8 months).
And I must admit some new favourites: a pair of jeans from Antropologie, yoga (and weekend) gear from Lululemon, shoes from the Shoefly.

Still, I’ll go to Vancouver for my post-natal urge to reinvent myself! (combines spending on travel and on what I would consider real fashion).

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It’s on the licence plates of Bonaire, and it’s the main reason people go to the little sister island, a 15 minute flight from Curacao. And the main reason we went there is to RELAX. We have no family, no schedule, no obligations and no friends on Bonaire. So it was just us (my parents included) at a resort we’ve been going to for about 20 years.

If you thought life is simple on Curacao, you actually take it a couple notches down on Bonaire. We didn’t end up doing much, and as we’d been there many times, we didn’t even take many pictures (except of Naomi of course, because she’s a superstar). We did go scuba diving, and I went kite surfing, and we swam and we read, and slept and chatted and ate, and hung out, and you get the picture.

I love Bonaire for its simplicity. The people, the pace, the options (for instance one major supermarket), the ease with which you drive around the island in no time. It is becoming a different place though now that the cruise ships stop here. More shops, more restaurants and more traffic during the days that the ships moor at Kralendijk. But I can imagine most of the cruise ship guests decide to stay on board for this stop, unless they want to go diving, surfing, mountain biking, see the donkey sanctuary or have cabin fever. It’s really a very rustic place, with nature conservation high on it’s agenda (the surrounding waters are an underwater national park)

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I’m, loving it! It’s been a long time since I was on the island where I was born, and I’ve really missed it.
Naomi did well traveling; she slept most of the flight (both Seattle-Miami and Miami-Curacao). To get her into a groove I focus on feeding her when she’s awake and get her to sleep close to me.
Willem is coming next weekend, but there are plenty of distractions, and other babies: Paloma and her 20-months old daughter Salome, Anouk and her 2 year old Max, and the other girlfriends who are over from Holland, from my sorority. It’s great to be able to see old friends in this setting. We’re all just chilling out, sipping our Amstel Brights and catching up on our lives and gossip.

It doesn’t take long for me to get into the groove and the pace of the island. In fact, I could really see us hang around here for a while. I’ve always imagined I would have my children in the tropics, so maybe around the time that #2 comes along? Naomi seems to be doing well in this climate, even though we do put the airco on when she goes to sleep. And she likes papaya and all other tropical fruits we’ve been giving her!

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Yes, they keep on coming. And trust me, if I would post every achievement that I considered a little victory it would become a full time job.

In the last weeks Naomi has discovered her shadow [she follows the shadow of her hand when in her crib], she’s holding her own pacifier in her mouth, and she got her first cereal. This is big, because this is considered the next phase from being a baby and generally starts at 4-6 months of age. For us, the transition to (or supplementing milk with) ‘real food’ was triggered by the way she stares at us when we eat. She obviously wants a piece of it, and we’re happy that she’ll be becoming more a part of family with the ability and the taste for the foods we eat as well (ok, beyond rice cereal).

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It was Naomi’s first flight, and she did great. On the way to, we had an early start. No big deal for her, because everything new is exiting for her. I nursed her during take-off and landing, an besides a bit of grumpiness because she didn’t sleep well, we were not the most annoying family in the flight. That was reserved for a boy of about 9 months who screamed a lot and –according to Willem- was not properly disciplined. We’ll wait and see how Naomi is at that age … you never know!

Once on location we tried to provide as many nap opportunities as possible, but it would usually take a walk in the sling to her to fall asleep for any notable period. The cabin where we stayed at El Capitan Canyon was roomy enough for the 3 of us, and Naomi slept with us in the bed. It’s magic to see you little one totally relaxed and surrendered next to you. It’s also easy to nurse her this way, even though I was afraid Willem’s arm would swing on top of her sometimes.

During the days we had a very chilled out schedule; going for walks, for meals and a trip here and there to the beach and the town of Santa Barbara. The best of all was that my brother and sister-in-law drove up from LA and hung out with us Saturday and Sunday. [We took full advantage of Martin Luther King Day weekend and spent four days there]. We BBQd and Chelsea taught us the American tradition of “smorgs” (spelling?): roasting a marshmallow in the fire, then sandwiching it with a sweet type of cracker and some chocolate. Extremely sweet, but a fun experience.

Naomi also got to see the sea for the first time: el Capitan Beach. A historic moment, because we’re hoping that she will be swimming, surfing and scuba diving in the sea during her lifetime!

The main disappointment of the weekend was that the Green Bay Packers (Willem’s football team) lost against the New York Giants. The men watched the game downtown in a sports bar, while the ladies went for coffee and a stroll.

We almost missed out flight, but all ended up well, and Naomi slept most of the flight back (actually, most of that day!). So we are optimistic that she has inherited her mother’s travel bug and will be a good traveler from now on. We will see soon enough as the Naomi Road show continues to the Caribbean!

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Is it normal that my baby wants to sleep all day? Is it normal that my baby wants to eat all day? Is it normal that my baby poops all day?
These and all other questions relating to newborns are discussed during the “First Weeks” drop-in at the Community Birth and Family Center on Eastlake.

It’s great: you get to go between 12 and 2pm (drop-in, so you don’t have to feel bad about being late, because it’s such a challenge to get anywhere on time with a new baby), and you talk with other new moms about what’s going on in your lives! The sessions are facilitated by a professional nurse and certified lactation consultant, and there’s no fee, just a suggested donation of $5. Judy is a lovely lady, now grandmother herself, who started “First Weeks” 10 years ago.

You notice that you’re not alone in many things that you are experiencing, and you get advice from the other moms and the nurse. At the end you get the list of all the moms and babies who were there that session in case you want to connect further.
We would usually go for a drink and bite to eat in the cafe next door and continue the conversations.

For me it was really helpful, and in a way it served to fill a void I feel we as Western women have, bringing up a child in this individualistic society. Looking at the ‘old days’ and at countries where people are still closer to nature and each other, I feel we’re not only missing out on a lot of female support, but we’re actually reinventing the wheel by having a baby ‘on our own’. Even with midwives, doulas and the fortunate ones who have their mother (or mother-in-law) around, the network of moms and the knowledge that gets passed on from one generation to the next seems to be lost.
The “First Weeks” get-togethers are for baby’s up to 3 months. Too bad I can’t make it to the next age group, as they get together during working hours …

Sometimes I wonder which fantastic tips we could use from the tribes in Africa, the women who carry they baby with them in a sling all day in South America, and the ancient wisdoms of Asia. Possibly an idea for a book to write.

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Today we took little Naomi to her first museum visit. With a Native American nanny, what more suitable museum could there be than the Burke Museum in the University district. She loved the photo exhibition of nature in the Pacific Northwest, was less impressed the giant squid exhibition, started to loose interest with the dinosaurs and couldn’t really be bothered at the multicultural floor. Maybe it was a little too much for her, because she fell asleep in the café.
We think that Naomi loves to see things. She can be semi-bored all day until she goes for a walk outside, or until we show her pictures. So of all her senses, we believe sight is her favourite.

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It actually snowed today – you can see snowflakes in background – on Christmas Day. While I was getting Naomi ready to go to mass we decided to pose for a picture, because besides the unique event of having snow, let alone having snow on Christmas day in Seattle, Naomi is wearing a dress!

She got the cute little outfit from her Godmother Dani in Switzerland, and to date, it’s the only dress she’s worn.

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It’s official after 3 nights: she slept for 10 HOURS!!! This is huge. It means we parents can start to catch up on months of sleep deprivation (note – that this started well before she was born, because in the last stages of pregnancy, I had to get up several times a night to go to the bathroom). And it means predictability in her pattern. It means we get some time back at night. And it means she’s out of her “fourth trimester” and more and more becoming a real little person.

Of course, this can all change in a whim; she could get into a new pattern, or her pattern can be disrupted (teething, illness, travel), and currently this works because we swaddle her tightly – something that supposedly babies grow out of. And then we’ll start all over again with what works, and what gets her to sleep through the night!

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Back at work – after 3 months of maternity leave. Not much has changed but some very big changes; new boss, some new colleagues, new challenges in the network, and new #1 priority in life. Not that work was my #1 priority, but it was pretty high up there. No more 12 hour days, no more 10pm nights, and no more multiple cups of coffee (as I’m still nursing – will spare you the details about pumping and all that). It’s hard to leave my little angel at home, but I also have to admit that I am not cut out to be a stay-at-home mom. So hey, might as well try to enjoy it, go home early, and make the best of the situation!

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